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Thursday, March 17, 2011

A Day in the Life of Bazinga

"Wake up, wake up, wake up," Bazinga whimpers as he scratches at his kennel. Bazinga, being  a very polite little fellow wakes us every morning with quiet little noises. He has never once found it necessary to bark or howl us awake. Good for him, if he woke me that way we would probably both die. First me of a heart attack and then my ghost would probably kill him. He lets us know he is ready to start the day and thinks it is time for us to be ready, too. Unfortunately, he doesn't always understand that he doesn't need to be up and moving as soon as the sun comes up. They really need to make clocks in dog language.

Up and moving we start the day with a trip outside. Some mornings he finishes quicker then others. He likes to roam and investigate his little world and be sure that everything is as it should be. I like to go out and come back in, I'm still sleepy, he is not. It is not the best combination, I'd like to think I win these struggles, but around the whole yard we go. Bazinga, is quite a thorough investigator. He sniffs and checks, what seems like, every blade of grass and every piece of dirt. "Look at this! Can I eat it? Oh, no look at this! Can I eat it? Wait, wait, wait, you HAVE to look at this! Can I eat it?"  Yeah,  that will surely come back to haunt us later.

Back inside he eats his breakfast and starts searching the house. His goal, Mia! Bazinga loves his kitty. Kitty is his most favorite toy EVER! He looks in the kitchen, he looks in the bedroom, finally there she is! She is sitting on a dining room chair. He runs up to her, "you want to play? You want to play? You want to play?" He asks excitedly. He pops his head up and peaks at her on the chair. He tries to nibble on her foot. She growls and bops him on the nose. She pretends to hate him. He jumps up and nips at her again. She clobbers him, and bites him on the nose.

"Get lost, brat!"Mia yells at him. She jumps down from the chair and runs to the stairway and waits for him. He runs after her and bites her on the tail. She runs up two steps, he runs up three. "I'm not touching you, I'm not touching you!" He nips at her, she clobbers him. She runs up two steps he runs up three. "I'm not touching you!" King of the hill seems to be a favorite game of theirs. They get to the top of the stairs and both seem baffled at what to do next. Neither of these animals are all that clever. Bazinga decides that a nip on the nose is in order, and Mia replies with a hiss and a slap. She runs into the bathroom and jumps up on the toilet seat. She lays down, he jumps at her. She is a very lazy fighter. She always finds the high ground, lays down and bats at Bazinga below. Bazinga has not yet figured out that he can jump up on things. This works well in Mia's favor.

Bored with Mia and her lazy ways, Bazinga moves on. He has several toys that must be killed on a regular basis. These toys forget their place in the world quite often and must be reminded. The only way to remind them is to attack them and shake them until they are dead. He quite often kills his toys in front of Mia. "This is what I will do to you! And this, and this" he says as he shakes his toys into submission. Mia looks at him, clobbers him and moves on.

"You will have to get me first," she grumbles. That dog forgets his place in the world quite often and she must remind him.

Unscathed, Bazinga, now exhausted from his very productive morning must pass out. He comes up to the couch and asks to be picked up. Once up, he conks out.

Ten minutes later he is up and ready to go out again. Around the yard, grass, dirt, leaves. Back in, eat, search, bite Mia, kill toys. It is a very busy world that Bazinga lives in. He has much to do and no support to get them all done. We humans even have the gall to take his toys and throw them when he is busy trying to kill them. It ruins his rhythm. It throws his whole day off balance. What's a dog to do?

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